Stages of Porn Addiction

Many people view porn addiction in terms of black and white. You either have it or you don’t.

This approach, however, is not very practical. It forces most of the people to react by denying any form of porn addiction, until they are presented with undeniable facts, such as getting into legal trouble, or getting caught by their spouse or children.

In his book “Treating Pornography Addiction” Dr. Kevin B. Skinner suggests viewing addiction not in terms of black and white, but rather in terms of stages.

Stage 1. Mild exposure – once or twice a year, no affect on regular life.

Stage 2. Pornography use does not indicate addiction – occasional looking at pornography with increased interest.

Stage 3. Signs of trouble – person looks about once a month, usually tries to avoid, but occasionally urge get so strong that cannot be controlled, and person gives in.

Stage 4. Individual notices increased sexual fantasies, and attempts to control them, which results in stronger withdrawal symptoms.

Stage 5. Pornography impacting day to day living with significant portion of the day spend thinking about pornography.

Stage 6. Pornography dominates most of the day to day lives, affecting work, school, and personal relationships.

Stage 7. Pornography and acting out consumes most of individuals time, leaving him feeling completely out of control.

This “staged” definition of porn addiction is very practical, and it allows individuals to recognize the signs of trouble and begin seeking help prior to arriving to stage 7.

Similar approach could be used with almost all pleasurable behaviors such as drinking coffee, eating, and watching TV, and I believe it provides a simple, but effective definition of addiction.

Call (916)259-3827 For Professional Help

P.S. Recommended Resources:

  • Sex Addicts Anonymous
    I cannot imagine my recovery without this program.
  • Mindful Habit Course by Coach Craig
    Great advice from a great person.
  • Free Podcast and Mini Course from Candeo Can
    I owe my first 90 days of continuous sobriety to this program and highly recommend it.
  • Internet Accountability Software
    Using this software allowed me to get truly honest with my internet usage for the first time in my life. For some reason knowing that my every step was being observed and reported on, made it really easy to use internet only in a healthy way.
  • Treating Pornography Addiction by Kevin B. Skinner Ph.D.
    I have read over 15 books on Pornography and Sexual addiction and this truly is one of the best books on the subject. The reason is I recommend this particular book is because it is full of excellent actionable steps. Other books do a good job describing the problem, but don’t really offer a realistic solution.
  • Your Sexually Addicted Spouse – How Partners Can Cope and Heal by Barbara Steffens Ph.D.
    I know that about half of visitors to our site are spouses of people who might be suffering with pornography and sex addiction. To the best of my knowledge this book is one of the most helpful books for the partners.
  • Free Consultation from Coach Craig
    Coach Craig has been a good friend and supporter of this site since January 2013. He has worked with people from all over the world, including famous musicians and other high profile individuals. Yet, he is only a phone call away and would be glad to give you a free consultation. Call him anytime, with any question you might have, and I am know he will be extremely happy to help in any way he can.

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  1. Me says

    There is no longer any doubt among doctors and therapists that the supposed negative effects of masturbation are false. It is a perfectly normal and healthy form of sexual expression. Ninety-five percent of men begin to masturbate at puberty, and many continue to do so throughout life without negative consequences.

    Masturbation only becomes a problem if it becomes a substitute for other forms of sexual activity.

    It is important however to masturbate in a way that will help you learn how to control ejaculation so that when you do have a partner premature ejaculation will not be an issue.

    No man is born with the ability to control. Controlling ejaculation is something you have to learn just as you had to learn to control your bladder as a child. We get taught to control our bladders but no one teaches us how to control ejaculation.

    This porn/masturbation “addiction” stuff is largely just a bunch of bible thumping born again christian catholic guilt trip bullshit in my opinion.

    The only way I could see it being a real problem is if you are spending so much time watching porn, masturbating, or even having sex that it radically interferes with your life, such as ruining your marriage and relationships or getting you fired from your job, etc.

    The biggest problem is that many of you feel the need to keep it as secret and lie to your partner or spouse about your porn and masturbation.

    If possible you and your partner or spouse should enjoy watching porn & and masturbating together or masturbating each other if you are too busy or tired to have intercourse. This can be just as loving and intimate.

    Most of the time when people view porn or masturbate it is because they are aroused, but their partner is not available, or is too tired or just not in the mood.

    Often men just need to experience the easy pleasurable stress release that masturbation provides without having too worry about pleasing their partner, or because they are too tired or stressed out from work to engage in intercourse with their partner.

    This is NOT WRONG!

    In fact I’m sure that most of you would agree that watching porn & masturbation are preferable to having an affair and cheating on your spouse or partner with someone else.

    There is nothing morally wrong with enjoying the pleasurable feelings of your own body.

    If God didn’t want us to masturbate, He would have made our arms too short for our hands to reach our genitals.


    • Me says

      Also a 2003 Australian study found that men who ejaculated more than five times a week were a third less likely to develop prostate cancer. Regularly flushing your system, so to speak, keeps your semen healthy and prevents the build up of cancer-causing chemicals.

      Another study, reported in the Journal of the American Medical Association, found that frequent ejaculations, 21 or more a month, were linked to lower prostate cancer risk in older men, as well, compared with less frequent ejaculations of four to seven monthly.

  2. Sos says

    There is no benefits to porn….i’ve been at this, it seems like forever. And i don’t see the light to any tunnel. I’ve prayed and it has helped me alot. But my ignorance has held me back time after time…save yourselves and find a way out. As quickly as possible. Or you will become a slave. But even slaves get their shackles off:). Dont give up!

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