You can spend thousands of dollars on the most expensive recovery course, but it will do you no good unless you take action.
Below is my old sexual recovery plan that I wrote almost 3 years ago. I got this idea from a book called Cybersex Exposed.
Sexual Recovery Plan
Column 1 – Problematic Actions
· Watching Pornography
Column 2 – Warning Signs That Sobriety Is in Jeopardy
· Going on the computer when nobody is around
· Engaging in any kind of activities on the Internet that are not work related
· Scanning the TV channels hoping to find something exciting or distracting
· Not resolving fights with other people
· Lying to myself or others, keeping secrets
· Working more than forty-five hours a week
· Not getting enough sleep or exercise
· Skipping my support groups or therapy
· Feeling overwhelmed, scattered or guilty
· Intense sexual fantasies
· Excessive sexual objectification of others
· Thinking about former sex or dating partners
Column 3 – The Positive Reward of Maintaining Sobriety and Refraining from My Primary Problem Activities
· Having more times with loved once and friends – better relationships
· Returning to hobbies and creative activities that bring pleasure
· Rediscovering romance with partner
· Taking some classes toward a possible new career
· Feeling clean and good about self
· Having more time for relaxation and fun
· Going to movies and theaters
· No need to be worried about getting caught lying
· Not having to apologize for being late
· Placing greater emphasis on financial health and stability
· Improved health
I recommend that you create a similar recovery plan for yourself.
As you can see, it consists of 3 parts.
I saw a poster at a rifle range once; it said, “If you don’t have a target, you will miss every time.”
You have to define for yourself what behaviors you are trying to stop. This will provide you with a starting point from which you can judge your progress.
Warning Signs That Sobriety Is in Jeopardy
Simply look back at your past acting out experiences and try to identify the behaviors that can serve as warning signs that you are about to act out.
The Positive Reward of Maintaining Sobriety and Refraining from My Primary
This is the most important part. Why do you want to stop?
Another saying that I’ve heard is that having a strong why (reason) can overcome almost any how (condition).
I recommend that you take the next 2 days to create your personal sexual recovery plan. Don’t worry about getting it perfect, just get the ball rolling and get something in writing.