Feed The Right Wolf

The Gift of Vision – Choose Wisely How to Use Your Eyes

Alex — Thu, 10 May 2012 18:50:58 +0000

I just saw this video about an Afghanistan veteran who has lost his vision in an improvised explosion blast, and who is now helping other wounded veterans to transition back to life. This just made me think of just how abusive I was of my own gift of vision when I used to spend countless hours acting out. I'll try to remember this thought next time when I'll get tempted. Now please excuse me while I go outside to look at some trees and the sky. Read more [...]

Healing the Mind

Kay Jones — Mon, 02 Apr 2012 15:44:05 +0000

In response to a family member’s recent illness, I have been reading My Stoke of Insight, by Dr. Jill Taylor. Dr. Taylor suffered a severe stroke, and after a long and challenging recovery, she wrote My Stroke of Insight to tell her story and share what she had learned about herself and about the brain. The book is not about addiction (although it is noteworthy that Dr. Taylor served on the board of directors for the National Alliance on Mental Illness), but it contains a wonderful introduction Read more [...]

Addiction From a Producer’s Stand Point – Choosing a Path That Should Have Been Avoided

Guest Post — Thu, 29 Mar 2012 21:51:31 +0000

It is not my intent to bash porn or the porn industry, that argument would be idle. Some of the people I have met in the industry are exemplary examples of professionals in how they conduct their business. Porn will always be around, no matter what and because of this it is totally dependent on the individual to do something to resolve issues of addiction. If you are reading this, there is a fair chance that you think you have a problem in your life related to porn or with sex in general. I have Read more [...]

Happiness is The Secret to Productivity, Stopping Addiction, and Anything Else in Life

FeedTheRightWolf — Sun, 25 Mar 2012 05:55:56 +0000

I haven't posted in a while, but today I came across this amazing video on TED. First 8 minutes of it, is just entertaining to watch, but towards the end the author gets to the point. The point being that once we are happy our productivity increases. Once I heard that I was really interested to hear what tips the author would give to help us feel happy. I was very surprised when he listed them out: Listing 3 new things that you are thankful for every day Journaling Exercise Meditation Random Read more [...]

What is Co-Dependency?

Kay Jones — Wed, 22 Feb 2012 22:08:41 +0000

My husband and I try to maintain a healthy sense of humor about even the most difficult things in life, including his porn and cybersex addiction and the strain it places on our marriage. Over the years, I have learned that if you have a choice between laughter and tears, laughter is healthier (and burns more calories). This year for Valentine's Day, my husband gave me a card which proclaimed Happy Co-Dependent's Day! and on the inside, be mine (he had also inserted a very sweet, heartfelt Read more [...]

Secrets, Transparency, and Recovery

Kay Jones — Tue, 07 Feb 2012 07:10:21 +0000

In one of his previous posts, Alex commented that you are only as sick as your worst secret. Secrets are your worst enemy in recovery, in trying to stay clean, and in trying to rebuild your relationship. Your spouse needs you to be transparent, especially where your online activities are concerned. Transparency allows him or her to see for himself or herself that you are "staying clean" and being an honest and faithful partner. In the aftermath of the kinds of behavior sex addiction Read more [...]

What to Expect from Therapy or Counseling

Kay Jones — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 04:08:05 +0000

When I walked nervously into my first counseling session about a year ago, I had no idea what to expect, and no idea how the process worked. A kindly woman about my mother's age opened the conversation with, "So, what are your objectives for counseling?" I was both confused and daunted; no one had warned me that there would be a quiz on the first day! "Um... to get better?" I stammered. I had sought counseling mostly at my husband's insistence, because he saw that the anger, grief, and Read more [...]

Married to a Sex Addict: What Does This Mean for Your Marriage?

Kay Jones — Mon, 06 Feb 2012 03:29:49 +0000

If you have just discovered that your spouse suffers from sex addiction, you probably have a lot of questions. "Why did he do this?" "Is there something wrong with me?" "Should I be angry?" "What does this mean for our marriage?" Your spouse's sex addiction does not necessarily mean that your marriage is over, or that you can never regain the intimacy and affection you previously had. If you are both willing to work and forgive, you can make your marriage strong and happy again. Read more [...]

Is Pornography Mostly Harmless? (No!)

Kay Jones — Thu, 02 Feb 2012 05:42:57 +0000

An unfortunately popular misconception in our culture is that pornography use is a normal, harmless habit. If you are a porn user, you may be relying on this idea to rationalize or justify your habit to yourself and your family (if you are a recovering addict, you may have done so earlier in your journey, and you already know better). This misinformation is one of the things keeping you trapped by your pornography habit. Please read this. If you are the spouse of an addict, your partner Read more [...]

You Are Not Alone

Kay Jones — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 11:15:04 +0000

Whether you are a recovering addict or a partner, sex addiction is difficult to talk about, even with people you normally trust. Unfortunately, our society still stigmatizes most mental health issues, so even more conventional illnesses like depression or anxiety disorders are too often met with skepticism, ignorance, or judgement. Sexual issues can be especially sensitive, for everyone involved. As a result, the long and difficult journey toward recovery can feel very lonely and isolated. Read more [...]