hey, I really like your new journal and the positivity and motivation you bring to it. it's natural to get horny though, it is possible that you can hold off on your desires for the day to have sex with your girlfriend when she gets home at night? I'm not sure what your philosophy on sex is, but I am a strong believer in healthy sexual outlets, porn being a very unhealthy one and sex between bf/gf a healthy one.
Thanks DanceSucka! I like to try to stay positive, it helps.
Anyway, hahaha, it's a nice notion, and your idea makes sense to me, but I'm 17. My girlfriend and I don't live with each other, we're in high school.
And (as far as I know) we both believe in waiting until marriage to have sex.
With THAT being said, sometimes I think I'm really fighting a tough war here. I mean, I'm a teenage guy. My hormones are RAGING and I'm coming to, if not at the peek of sexual desire! It's a long story, but basically my friend first introduced me to porn in 5th grade (I was really hesitant and disgusted of it at first) but then I grew to like it... and so on, and so on. It got to the point where could barely look at a girl without remember some scene or some pose...
Either way, I noticed the stuff really changed me as a person, and it hurt my friendships and relationships.
Which bring me to my next thought... I'm REALLY ANGRY at society today. I talked about this with my girlfriend before, and it made her upset, but it's true! Society has become a massive temptation. Everywhere you go you see women wearing revealing clothing. Every magazine, and every television ad always displays half-naked and revealing women. Here's one for me - I love House and Electro-House music, and today it's even hard to go on Youtube to look it up without finding videos with very revealing pictures. HONESTLY! It's EVERYWHERE. Our society is dripping with perversion and temptation everywhere. Why is it like this!?
I'm thinking about this because today particularly was pretty difficult with that. I've noticed some things about myself. This morning I've masturbated before getting ready for school after waking up. I usually don't do it in the morning, but I haven't slept in 2 days and three days ago I've only slept a couple of hours so I was frustrated. 1: Days in which I do that in the morning I am basically more of... a douche. I don't know what the chemistry behind it is, but I'm really cocky on days I've acted out sexually. (no pun intended, but yeah, you can laugh, I did.
) 2: On days I act out, throughout the entire day, I view women more lustfully than normal. Essentially my mind gets thinking more about sex, which isn't good by any means.
Otherwise today was a pretty good day. I was sad for a few reasons but I recently called my friend and apologized for something I did and it's fine now. I feel better about that. But I still have unfinished business with another friend I have to take care of. Either way, being a dependent adolescent sucks no matter which way you look at it and there are so many stresses in life I have right now. Once school is done in a few days I'll have a big load off my back.
Day 3 went running home to its mommy cause I'm just too big and dangerous for it! Woo! Let's go!
I'll keep fighting. I have to. For God, for myself, my friends and family, and of course, for my lovely girlfriend. <3