Feed the Right Wolf

Hmm... Sorta like porn addiction? You can learn a lot from pets I guess! XD

Ohhh that's your fianceeeeeee, now things make more sense. That's really great that you're both on this site. That's a really good example for others. I'm sorry about the dog :/ I have a dog too, her name's Bella. She an adorable little Bichon Freeze.

_________________
Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

- 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Hi kids,

Things in my life are still going well. I'm past 8 months sober, and I met with my sponsor to go over 4th step on Sunday. I have a lot to go back and work on, like adding more details to my character defects section. Most of my defects are judgment, superiority, and fear; specifically fear of inferiority (which explains the superiority and judgment - trying to over-compensate in a harmful way rather than face my fears).

We're getting some dental work done on Pickle, she still has a couple teeth that need to come out. It's scary because she's such a tiny dog and they have to put her under... I'm thankful I have some time off next week so I can be around when she has the procedure.

Work is going well and I've never been more grateful for everything in my life. Right now I have a great relationship with my fiance and we're building a great life and an even better relationship with each other. I feel so much more at peace with myself and I actually enjoy waking up in the morning. I have a huge circle of other addicts I can rely on for help and in turn they can rely on me, and it feels good to finally have meaningful relationships without the primary motivation being how I can benefit.

Keep moving forward, everyone, I can promise you the rewards of working to be a better person are well worth it

Your friend,
Absolution.

_________________
Sobriety Date: October 25, 2011
"Everything comes to us that belongs to us if we create the capacity to receive it."
-Rabindranath Tagore

Inspiring, Motivating...Thank You!!!

Ditto, Absolution. You and FP are in inspiration. You both mean a lot to a bunch of folk here.
CSC

_________________
Kind regards, CSC

"I wished for nothing beyond her smile, and to walk with her thus, hand in hand, along a sun-warmed, flower-bordered path. (Andre Gide)"

Been a NEW MAN since: April 16, 2012

Ditto...ditto? Well, me three! Ugh, you know what I mean.

You really are an inspiration and motivation to keep going. You make me really excited to keep moving forward so that hopefully someday I'LL be at 8 months, and then a year! Keep it up! I'm so happy for you.

Oh and good thoughts for Pickle! I'm sure she'll be ok!

_________________
Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

- 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

Hi, I wanna talk about forgiveness and how we treat ourselves as addicts.

I read a meditation a few days ago that addressed this and it was pretty impactful. It basically explained that the golden rule - do unto others as you'd have them do unto you - should include how we treat ourselves as well. We should do unto ourselves as we would have others do unto us.

It's true, and it's not selfish at all. Do we want other people to hold grudges against us and treat us badly for our past addictive behavior? Probably not, so we should extend that to how we think about ourselves and to our self-talk. Why do so many of us (myself included) feel that others may have a right to forgive us, but it's selfish to forgive ourselves?

For me, this just clicked. Do unto ourselves as we would have others do unto us. I feel renewed after reading this, like it's ok for me to forgive myself and let go of resentments against myself for what I've done. I hope others feel the same way and remember this.

Your friend,
Absolution.

_________________
Sobriety Date: October 25, 2011
"Everything comes to us that belongs to us if we create the capacity to receive it."
-Rabindranath Tagore

Absolution, this post makes absolute sense. If you can't forgive yourself how can you ever truly heal yourself and move on? It also goes hand in hand with judging each other. I have found that since this started I am not so quick to judge other people any more. I have no desire to be judged by anyone so I no longer do it to others. It makes me feel better about who I am.

Also, congratulations on 8 months. I am almost there.

Take care.

_________________
Sobriety date: November 6, 2011
In all you do, remember the end of your life and then you will never sin. Sirach 7:36

Love and time can heal just about anything.

Failure is not an option.

Great point Absolution! Very well said.

_________________
Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your bodies.

- 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

I've been adding more detail to the columns for my 4th step, and I met with my SAA sponsor last night to go over it. We listed the character defects that appear most often and talked about them, and now I have to work on identifying some character assets. This part will be a little tough for me because I am resistant on some level to viewing my character in a positive way, especially relating back to active addiction. I'm going to start that portion tonight.

Everything else in my life is going pretty well. Yesterday I went back to work after taking 5 days off, so that's not too much fun, but I feel content with where I am and it feels good to be making progress on myself and in my relationships.

Your friend,
Absolution.

_________________
Sobriety Date: October 25, 2011
"Everything comes to us that belongs to us if we create the capacity to receive it."
-Rabindranath Tagore

Hi Ab Old recovering buddy!

I wrote this in my journal as well, just in case you do not get time to read it

Yeah still here. Not going to stop. I do NOT want porn anymore and if we can keep letting others know that it is possible then maybe in a small way we can inspire others to quit. Like Alex has with this whole site.
You likewise have been setting a good example for others.
Boy have I come a long way. Something that I am reading which is very interesting is:
"How to quit without feeling S**t"
Very very very interesting that we need the right chemicals in our brains to be 'normal'.
Sleep is so important, good food, veg, fruits, nuts, and so on.
Like Alex said we need to look after ourselves.

My whole life is changing for the better Ab. As I type this I get teary eyed because it feels good.
Tears of joy

I know we do not count days, but the markers help us to get more positive about recovery.
210 days makes me believe that I can actually do this!

Thanks for all your support along the way Ab.

Peter