Feed the Right Wolf

April 23

Self care list:journaling;
ERP practice;
read recovery literature;
practiced sports;

Strong emotions that I felt during the day: Excitement,Joy,Fulfilment,Happiness,Shame.

Negative beliefs that affected my day:none;

How did I get out of isolation: practiced sports .

Things that I'm thankful for:that I passed another day succesfully,that I'm rewireing my brain, that ppl accept me just as I am.

Positive things that I've learned:Recovery is 99% about avoiding being in a bad place emotionally, and only 1% about getting yourself out of a bad spot.

Sobriety date Friday 20th of April.

"There is no habitual thought pattern, emotional response or typical action wich we cannot change"

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Hi sabu,
Just wanted to encourage you today. You sound very positive about your recovery and ~I~ am also encouraged that if others can make progress, then so can I. We have a journey ahead of us, you and me. We are heading to a better place. I have a strong feeling that, even though I don't know you, you are going to develop some strengths you never thought you had. Succeed in ways you never thought possible.

Your 'motto' about rewiring the brain give ~me~ hope too that P&M addiction can be beaten. I get so sick of reminding myself constantly how addicted I am and reflecting on how many years I have been lost to my addiction. What have I missed out on? What has that cost me?

Occasionally I like to think sometimes looking forward. (My pen name ClearSkyComing reflects that.) To the opportunities that the freedom our struggles bring, is really going to be worth it. I am looking forward to the day then that freedom is so obvious to me that "acting out" seems silly.

I wish you all the very best in your journey and encourage you to look forward to a fantastic life ahead.
You deserve it, but you must build it.
CSC

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Kind regards, CSC

"I wished for nothing beyond her smile, and to walk with her thus, hand in hand, along a sun-warmed, flower-bordered path. (Andre Gide)"

Been a NEW MAN since: April 16, 2012

Hi clearsky,
I've been absent to the forum for a while and today I saw your message, it's most encouraging, gave me nothing but positive hopes. I feel the same way about my addiction and do belive that we will be porn free one day and acting out will seem silly. Thanx again for your post, it's much apreaciated.

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May 1st

Self care list: slept good 10 h;
stayed hydrated;
ate healthy.
Strong emotions that I felt during the day:Joy,Positivity,Well-Being.

Negative beliefs that affected my day:That I'm not focusing enough on the right wolf. Truth : It's the perfect time to just come back to my practices and start over.

How did I get out of isolation:Had a barbeque with a lot of freinds in nature;

Things that I'm thankful for:that I'm still motivated to continue my journey, all my friends, that I accept myself just as I am.

Sobriety date Friday 27th of April;

"There is no habitual thought pattern, emotional response or typical action wich we cannot change"

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May 2

Self care list:slept good 10 h;
stayed hydrated;
ERP practice;
journaling;
read recovery literature.
Strong emotions that I felt during the day:Boredom,Regret,Excitement,Negativity.

Negative beliefs that affected my day:Belief:That I will fall prey to my addiction soon. Truth:If I continue to practice all my tools and exercises I will be able to walk away.

How did I get out of isolation:Visited a friend at his house.

Things that I'm thankful for:my life as it is, the place where I live,that I have what I need.

Sobriety date Friday 27th of April;

"There is no habitual thought pattern, emotional response or typical action wich we cannot change"

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May 3

Self care list: slept good 10 h;
stayed hydrated;
ERP practice;
journaling;
mindful meditation 15 min;
read recovery literature.

Strong emotions that i felt during the day:Irritation,Regret,Shame,Joy,Excitement.

Negative beliefs that affected my day:Belief:That sex is my most important need.Truth:I should see wich area s of my life need improving.

How did I get out of isolation:Hanged out with a friend that came to visit.

Things that I'm thankful for:the money I make, my views on reality, my skills.

Sobriety date Friday 27th of April;

"There is no habitual thought pattern, emotional response or typical action wich we cannot change"

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Hi Sabu,
I am enjoying you posts. You make some interesting points.
Yes! I agree it strange to ponder that sex is so much a need in our lives.
It certainly is for me. Every day, every hour, the sex thought pops into my brain.
10 seconds after I wake up and 10 seconds before I fall asleep.

Its a real driving force, but I think it's not the problem. We probably don't
want to reject our sexuality as dirty or something to be pushed back.
I am trying to get rid of the "rubbish sex". P&M and provocative thoughts
with I see a pretty gal. Undisciplined TV, and movies that I know contain
provoking scenes. I'm hoping with all that stuff excluded what will remain
is my healthy sex life and attitudes....anyways that the theory.

I am with you buddy, we are in this together and I appreciate walking a ways with you,
BTW - Good for you with the ERP exercises. I am really benefiting from mine every day.

_________________
Kind regards, CSC

"I wished for nothing beyond her smile, and to walk with her thus, hand in hand, along a sun-warmed, flower-bordered path. (Andre Gide)"

Been a NEW MAN since: April 16, 2012

May 4

Self care list:slept good 10 h;
stayed hydrated;
journaling;
ERP practice;
mindful meditation 20 min;
afternoon nap.

Strong emotions that I felt during the day:Excitement,Confidence,Peace,Stress.

Negative beliefs that affected my day:none.

How did I get out of isolation:Hanged out with a freind that came to visit.

Things that I'm thankful for:changeing my life one step at a time, my family, just being me i guess.


Sobriety date Friday 27th of April;

"There is no habitual thought pattern, emotional response or typical action wich we cannot change"

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Hi sabu. It seems you have a good progress in recovery. Wish you the best through the road of recovery.

Wonder if the mindful meditation is helpful for you. Currently, I'm looking forward to learn it. Hope you don't mind to share some sources for it. Thank you.

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"God, grant that I may seek to comfort rather than to be comforted; to understand,rather than to be understood; to love,rather than to be loved." - Alex Wolf

May 5

Self care list:slept good 10 h;
journaling;
ERP practice;
stayed hydrated;
ate healthy;
Strong emotions that I felt during the day:Frustration,Boredom,Excitement,Apathy.

Negative beleifs that affected my day:Belief:That I won't be able to have a healthy sexual realtionship beacause of my addiction.
Truth:If I continue to turn to positive outlets, I will be able to break free from my addiction.

How did I get out of isolation: Went on a nature trip.

Things that I'm thankful for: my vacation, the support that I received on this forum.


Sobriety date Friday 27th of April;

"There is no habitual thought pattern, emotional response or typical action wich we cannot change"

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